Monday, November 30, 2015

Worried--Updated in the comments

Just a quick post today as I get ready to head out the door. Not to work, as expected, but to go visit my dad. He had to make a trip to the ER this morning, and I'm worried about him.

Dad's health is very poor. He has some chronic conditions that he's been living with for years now, not least of which is congestive heart failure. Over the weekend he started having severe shortness of breath. He wouldn't go see a doctor until this morning (mom says he was frightened), and it turns out that he has a lot of fluid building up around his heart, and his blood pressure is sky-high. He won't have to be admitted to the hospital, thank goodness, but they're giving him a lot of medications to drain the fluid and to stabilize his BP and he has to go back Wednesday to have a stress test and some other tests, too.

Even though dad won't have to stay in the hospital, I still feel like I need to go see him. My parents live an hour's drive away, so it's not too far. I had to call out of work, and mom and dad both tried to talk me out of doing that, but family comes before my job. Always. Also, my boss was super nice about it. Even he's not enough of an asshole to begrudge a callout when it's a family emergency!

Part of the urgency on my part to go see my dad right now, today, is partly superstitious fear. Both his father and his brother dropped dead of massive heart attacks without any prior warning at all, at relatively young ages.  My uncle was in his late 50's and younger than my dad is now.  And unlike dad he had no prior health issues and no history of heart trouble. He just felt bad one day, went to take a nap, and his wife found him dead in bed a couple of hours later. I'd never forgive myself if I said, "Ok dad, since the doctor thinks you'll be ok this time I'll just wait to visit", and then something happened to him tonight.

Also, tomorrow is the first of December. I know what I'm about to say is going to sound ridiculous and superstitious, but for me that's the month that's always meant death and disaster. I've blogged before about all the bad things that have happened in my life in the month of December. There have been the sudden deaths of relatives, pet deaths, cancer diagnoses, and job losses...always in December. I dread it every year, and superstitious or not, I'm not taking a chance with not going to see my dad today. I need to go make sure he's okay.

I'll update this post later today or tonight after I've seen how he is. Any good thoughts sent our way will be much appreciated!


  1. Sorry Jennifer. There's not much that anybody can say except we hope your dad pulls through and that a year from now he's relatively fit and healthy, looking forward to another Christmas. You made the right choice - rushing across to be with him - proving by your very presence how much you love him.

  2. Like YP, I think you did the right thing, and I am glad you put family before the job.
    What you describe about your uncle's death sounds rather similar to how my husband died 6 years ago, less than a week after his 41st birthday. He was perfectly alright when I left for work in the morning (he had the day off) and we hugged and kissed goodbye. When I came home from work late afternoon, I found him dead on the floor in our living room.
    I'll wait for your update and hope it will be good news, considering circumstances.
    Sorry to hear December has often meant such bad things in your life.

    1. That is so incredibly sad. I'm so sorry about your husband's untimely death. How awful for you, I can't even imagine how difficult that must have been. Hugs to you, my friend.

  3. I am sending you and your familly a lot of good thoughts.

  4. Sending good thoughts to you and your Dad.

  5. Hope that your father is ok Jennifer and yes family does come before work. December? yep usually a crap month for me too :-(

  6. I pray for your father, you, and the rest of your family. Aging is difficult, but can also bring joy. I had one brother. He was seventeen when I was born. When he graduated from high school, I was a few months old, and he moved out of the house. I recall visits from him, but I never knew him. Quite a few years ago, he went to bed one night and didn't wake up in the morning. His heart stopped as he slept. He was overweight and was a heavy drinker. I see that as a peaceful death. You are a good, loyal daughter to take off from work to see your dad. I hope everything turns out well.


  7. Thank you all for your kind comments.

    Dad is at home taking a whole lot of medication to stabilize everything. They think he was on the verge of a heart attack when he went to the ER but thank goodness, he didn't have one. On Wednesday when they do his stress test they'll have a better idea of how to proceed. It's almost a certainty that he's going to have to have some kind of major surgery. If so, he'll be at the hospital here in the town where I live because it's the best one in this part of the state. It's also less than 10 minutes from my house so my mom can stay at our house for as long as she needs to.

    Dad has other health problems besides his heart troubles and some of them have been getting worse for months now and no one told me. My mom's best friend told her off the other day for keeping his problems from me and threatened to call me herself if mom didn't do it. (Mom didn't want me to worry. But as Marie pointed out, it's a daughter's right to worry.) Bless her kind heart. I'll have to make a point of thanking her for talking some sense into my mom and convincing her to talk to me about what's going on.

    I really appreciate all of the concern everyone has shown. It means more to me than I can say.

  8. Good to hear that your dad is back home; lets hope that the meds do the job.

    As for December, I have a superstition about all new months. Before uttering any other words on the 1st of each month I have to say 'white rabbit, white rabbit'. It's worked for me so far!

    1. I said it when I woke up this morning! May it bring us both good luck!