Saturday, August 6, 2022

Week two: settling in

Week two of work is now done. Despite the fact that each day flew by (there's so much on my plate now) the week seemed terribly long. The students came back to school on Monday, so the new year started for real.

I still don't know what to make of my new boss. On Monday afternoon I noticed that three of the office women had little arrangements of flowers delivered and sitting on their desks. I asked the secretary, "Those are so pretty! Who sent them to you?" and she said, "Miss (principal's firstname)!"  She had flowers delivered to the secretary, the bookkeeper, and the student data manager/registrar. Guess which "office lady" didn't get any flowers? Yep. I was the only one. I didn't know what to think. It's weird for her to send flowers for no apparent reason to a few staff members in the first place, but then to leave me out was not only strange, but rude. My feelings were hurt. I wondered what it could mean. Then I decided, to hell with it. If she wants to be weird and rude and to play favorites, I guess that's her business. My business is to do the best job I can, to learn a lot of new skills, and then to move along at the end of the year if I'm not valued where I am. I let it go, but I still think it was shitty of her. 

Then, to really make things confusing, on Wednesday night she sent me an email. She said, "I just wanted you to know how proud I am of the wonderful job you're doing getting the permanent records back in order. Excellent work!" Honestly, I'd rather have validating words like that than flowers, but it sure seems like a lot of mixed messages. I guess time will tell.

I do like the challenge of my new job duties. By the time I left yesterday I felt like I was finally beginning to gain my footing a little bit. I've made a good start and I've learned a whole lot already. I miss working closely with the students and really getting to know them, though. A few kids asked what had happened to me (since I'm no longer at the desk in the lobby) and came and found my office to give me a hug. One was a trans boy named Nick who's living in a foster home. We've been special friends since last year and I try to be loving and accepting to him--something he desperately needs.  I was genuinely so happy to see him, and he knows it. We spent a good ten minutes catching up before I sent him on to class. Another day, I was in the cafeteria at lunchtime and heard someone say, "Hey Ms. Barlow!!" I turned around and it was another boy that would sometimes stop by my desk and talk last year. He'd grown a tiny little wispy moustache over the summer (!!) so when he came over to hug me, I said, "Caleb! Look at you! You've grown about a foot taller over the summer and you have a moustache now, too!" He smiled shyly and said, "I have a beard now too! But I shaved it." Haha! Judging by how wispy his little moustache was, I doubt he has any serious need to shave. I pretended to be impressed, though, because he was very proud. Isn't that adorable? So, I'll definitely miss the close relationship with kids after this current batch of returning students move on to high school. That won't happen while I'm  tucked away in an office somewhere, of course.

So that's it for me this week. I've been reading blogs on my lunch break and sometimes after work, but now blogger won't allow me to comment on most blogs when I'm using my phone. I still regularly have to go retrieve "good" comments from the spam folder, too. I know blogger is a free service, but I really wish some of theses issues would get resolved. I've been really tired these past two weeks but that's starting to get better. When I left work yesterday, for the first time this year, I felt like I was finally starting to get my footing a little bit with my "new" jobs. I'll try to *blog about something else besides work going forward. I'm sure it's getting boring.

Have a nice weekend, my friends!

*Tuesday will be my blog's 12th birthday!! I can't even believe I've been at this blogging thing for that long! Read my very first (very short) post here.

37 comments:

  1. You may be dealing with a boss who isn't...quite...right. Or something. That sounds so weird. And you haven't really been able to get a read on her since you met her. It's like her words and actions do not match up the way they should.
    Anyway, Happy Blogaversary! I'm so glad I found you. At our cores, you and I are very much alike, I think.

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  2. Your new boss does seem very uneven, and up and down. I can't take that either, it drives me crazy. It's nice to know what your boss thinks and what kind of job you're doing. I hope you find something when the time comes and then you can get the hell out of there.

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    1. Thank you Maddie! Several veteran teachers are also unhappy with her so far, too, and if things don't improve they'll probably be leaving next year, too. We'll see. Next June feels very far away.

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  3. How nice that Nick and Caleb sought you out for a special "Hi!" Caleb's pride in his wispy moustache made me smile too.

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    1. Caleb is a sweet boy. Very socially awkward, but sweet.

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  4. I do believe you had said that most, if not all of the old staff, the women who were rude, left. If those 3 people were new hires, the flowers may have been a welcome gift. I wouldn't take it personally. Congrats on 12 years!!

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  5. Perhaps your new boss is insecure or inexperienced and the mistakes she is making are due to that. Me? A job that allows me to work alone, out of the bullshit zone would suit me perfectly. Better than flowers.

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    1. Working alone is great, although I miss the students.

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  6. Goodness ! Not so sure about your new Principle but I would keep all the emails and comment she sends you.
    Your blog is one of the 3 I can comment on now but I get warnings on all the others ?
    Hello to the gud dugs

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    1. Yes, I plan to hang onto any positive feedback I get from her....in case she decides she doesn't like me in the future and that changes.

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  7. Perhaps the other office ladies have been at their jobs for a year or so, and she was recognizing that. Best not to dwell overly on it; do your job and make sure that is recognized at the appropriate review time.
    How heart warming that children you have befriended have searched you out.

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    1. A couple of other kids have seen me in the hall and have run over for hugs. I have good rapport with most of our students and I'll miss those relationships.

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  8. I should think the lack of flowers was simply an oversight, or a particular welcome for the other ladies. As you say, kind words are worth far more than a delivery of flowers.

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    1. It's not so much the flowers (which is a minor thing that I don't really care about anyway) but about a pattern of behavior from this woman that gives me cause for concern. Hopefully things will settle down and she'll be a bit more balanced going forward.

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    2. She's probably very nervous!!!

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  9. From everything you told us about your new boss, she sounds like a very unbalanced person. I guess you'll just have to take the good with the bad (or the other way round) where she is concerned; your attitude at doing the best you can, learn new skills and eventually move on is the way to go about it.
    Lovely to meet some of the students again!
    If I remember correctly, Little P's mother does not work at your school anymore, so you won't get to see him at all - that's a shame.

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    1. I spoke to Little P.'s mom the other day. He's now attending the school where she works. It's in a town about 30 miles away. I miss that little boy so much! By the way, his name is Prophet. Now that he doesn't even attend school in Florence it's probably ok for me to use his first name, even though it's unusual.

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    2. Also, we're going to try to get together soon for Mexican food, so I'll get to see her and Prophet then. But it won't be the same as seeing him every day after school :(

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  10. That was a nice message to receive from the principal. Maybe she considers you a different category from the administrative support staff. She doesn't seem very consistent. I hope things settle in and become pleasant.

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  11. Yeah! Mixed messages from Victoria Principal. I think she needs the guidance of a management consultant who specialises in education and I would be happy to oblige if she flies me over there. Please inform her of my offer.

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  12. This is a nice post. Maybe your boss set something up on the www to send the flowers weekly and it needs to be altered to include you. Never take offence at such things until you understand how it all works. Always go for the fuck up or careless oversight rather than the intentional slight. Great that some lads remember and miss you.

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    1. I wouldn't have minded the flower thing so much except she's been kind of rude to me and to my husband (over the aquarium thing) AND she dangled the possibility of a job I wanted over my head, then hired someone for the spot the day before I was set to interview with her for it. So far she hasn't been very nice to me.

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  13. She gave you a promotion, and she didn't for the other three. Perhaps she was just wanting to let them know she appreciates them, thinking maybe they felt overlooked? So hard to know. At some point I hope you have the chance to casually ask her why she didn't give you the opportunity to apply for the other job you wanted and she had encouraged you to consider. I agree with Mitchell that it seems she likely considers you a different category from the front office staff.

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    1. I guess you could call it a promotion, although no extra money came with it. Just a lot of new responsibilities and an unused office to work from. One of the people she sent flowers to was the person who got the job she dangled in front of me and then denied me a chance at, and another of the flower recipients was half of the "mean girl" duo that caused me so much grief last year. That bothered me the most.

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    2. Oh gee, I see what you mean.

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  14. Maybe your new boss is scared because the school was left in such a mess and she has got to clean it all up. There could be a lot of pressure on her from administration and parents.
    Focus on the positive and keep up the great work! How nice that the kids are looking for you!

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    1. I think she's nervous about the magnitude of the job in from of her....but she asked for it, and she'll be making a very good salary. So, it's all on her!

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  15. Well, print off a copy of the email extolling your skills and put it in your permanent file (at home). Good to have if you decide to change workplaces at the end of the year. :)

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  16. Learning a new job is tough for everyone, including the principal. However, having taught in a school for 37 years, I would say to watch your back and keep your options open. There are some red flags with this administrator.

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  17. Good luck with the boss; may this be a case of 'getting settled down'.

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  18. That's very strange about the flowers. If she couldn't give them to everyone it seems weird she would give them to anyone, without a very specific reason (birthday, employment anniversary, etc). The e-mail seems to show that she wasn't consciously snubbing you in any way, though. Glad you're finding satisfaction in your new tasks. I still can't believe you're all back at work/school already!

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  19. Your new principal is hard to figure out. Be sure to keep all the emails she sends you that are thanking or praising you, maybe print them out. I saw in the comments you explained where little P is, you have such a sweet relationship with him, nice to hear you will be meeting up with him and his mom.

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