Friday, March 23, 2012


Today I am 37 years old! I cannot believe how quickly time goes by. I am hoping this will be a good year for me and my family.

My sweet husband made secret plans with his mom to get me a birthday gift-a nice (and desperately needed!) new set of pots. My mother in law and sister in law drove down from Raleigh, NC the other day just to deliver my gift...and a delicious chocolate cake, too! It was so very thoughtful of them to help Gregg out with the gift, not that I needed (or expected) anything.

Today I go in to work for a few hours, then I will be taking Gregg to a doctor's appointment. Tonight, I plan to get together for Japanese food and drinks with my best friends. It will be partly a birthday celebration for me, and partly a going away party for my one friend who is moving away next week. So it will be a very bittersweet celebration. Still, I'm looking forward to a good time tonight with the girls!

Monday, March 19, 2012

Can't get a break

These days I feel like I just can't get a break in life. Hello? Universe? It's me...the girl you've been hammering with crisis and woe for months there some lesson in all this I'm not getting? Haven't I had enough crappy luck and stressful life events? Go pick on someone else awhile, why don't you?!


With all the major drama in my life over the past few months, you would think something good and positive would finally happen for me. I can't seem to get a break. The latest items on my "how much does my life suck right now" list seem relatively minor, but it is beginning to feel like the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. I am almost at the of my rope.

I just found out that one of my best friends (that I've counted on for lots of emotional support recently) is moving away to Texas. Her husband got a job offer, and things are happening fast....she will be gone by the 30th or 31st of this month. Not only is she a very good friend, but I have also gotten attached to her little daughter. It is making me feel very sad, even though it is a wonderful opportunity for my friend and her family...they want to be back in a bigger city, and they're moving to Houston. The job the husband got is a good one. They have been hoping for something like this to happen. I am happy that they're getting what they want, and I know that with the internet, facebook, text messaging, etc., that we will still have lots of contact. But still. Internet contact isn't the same as a flesh and blood friend whose shoulder you can cry on if need be.

Then I've been having some mild troubles with certain coworkers at my job. It's not a big deal, but it's irritating and mildly stressful on a day to day basis. While I am so grateful for my job and the benefits it provides my husband while he finishes cancer treatment....I really, really don't like it very much. I want to find a job that suits me better and makes me happier. But to say that now is not the right time to look would be a very large understatement.

Then there is the ongoing stress of my husband being sick. He's been out of work for months, so money is very tight. His first chemotherapy treatment ended up affecting him so badly he wound up back in the hospital for three days. They got the side effects under control (or so it seems) this past week when he had his second treatment. So far he is ok, thank goodness, but he is taking lots of pain pills (the chemo was triggering severe nerve pain in the site where he had surgery)and lots of other pills, besides. So he sometimes doesn't seem like himself...not in a bad way, necessarily, but he's definitely foggy most of the time. And that's kind of lonely for me. I want the end of April (the end of his chemo) to hurry up and get here. I want my husband back!!

And I'm ready for some good things to start happening in my life. Surely I've used up several years' worth of pain, sadness, and plain old bad luck these last few months. I sure hope so. Things sure seem hard these days.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Hard at work

Our blueberry bushes have burst into bloom this week. A small army of bees have arrived, and are hard at work collecting pollen. I think blueberry flowers are beautiful. The bees seem to think so too!

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Rainy spring morning

In Just-
  spring   when the world is mud-
  luscious the little
  lame balloonman

  whistles   far   and wee

  and eddieandbill come
  running from marbles and
  piracies and it's

  when the world is puddle-wonderful

  the queer
  old balloonman whistles
  far   and   wee
  and bettyandisbel come dancing

  from hop-scotch and jump-rope and



  balloonMan   whistles

e.e. cummings

It has been raining for most of the past week.  Everything continues to bud and bloom early, especially with all this extra moisture.  This is my favorite time of year.  Very early spring is so beautiful in this part of the world, and March is my birthday month.  I don't anticipate much of a birthday celebration this year due to the ongoing health/financial issues in our household, but I do plan to take the time to notice and appreciate my favorite season. 

Friday, March 2, 2012


I cannot believe it is March already! I've been so busy lately that I haven't noticed the passing of time, and all of a sudden I looked up yesterday and it was spring already.  Trees are flowering, the air is warm and mild (and rainy, today) and the birds are well into their nest building/courtship display/feeder raiding activities.  Every morning it's like a raucous bird party outside my window as soon as the sun is up. Of course Marco and the two little finches we keep have to greet the day in a similar noisy fashion. Spring mornings make us all happy to be alive.

Daffodils are the official flower of March.