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Monday, March 19, 2012

Can't get a break

These days I feel like I just can't get a break in life. Hello? Universe? It's me...the girl you've been hammering with crisis and woe for months now...is there some lesson in all this I'm not getting? Haven't I had enough crappy luck and stressful life events? Go pick on someone else awhile, why don't you?!

Sigh.

With all the major drama in my life over the past few months, you would think something good and positive would finally happen for me. I can't seem to get a break. The latest items on my "how much does my life suck right now" list seem relatively minor, but it is beginning to feel like the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. I am almost at the of my rope.

I just found out that one of my best friends (that I've counted on for lots of emotional support recently) is moving away to Texas. Her husband got a job offer, and things are happening fast....she will be gone by the 30th or 31st of this month. Not only is she a very good friend, but I have also gotten attached to her little daughter. It is making me feel very sad, even though it is a wonderful opportunity for my friend and her family...they want to be back in a bigger city, and they're moving to Houston. The job the husband got is a good one. They have been hoping for something like this to happen. I am happy that they're getting what they want, and I know that with the internet, facebook, text messaging, etc., that we will still have lots of contact. But still. Internet contact isn't the same as a flesh and blood friend whose shoulder you can cry on if need be.

Then I've been having some mild troubles with certain coworkers at my job. It's not a big deal, but it's irritating and mildly stressful on a day to day basis. While I am so grateful for my job and the benefits it provides my husband while he finishes cancer treatment....I really, really don't like it very much. I want to find a job that suits me better and makes me happier. But to say that now is not the right time to look would be a very large understatement.

Then there is the ongoing stress of my husband being sick. He's been out of work for months, so money is very tight. His first chemotherapy treatment ended up affecting him so badly he wound up back in the hospital for three days. They got the side effects under control (or so it seems) this past week when he had his second treatment. So far he is ok, thank goodness, but he is taking lots of pain pills (the chemo was triggering severe nerve pain in the site where he had surgery)and lots of other pills, besides. So he sometimes doesn't seem like himself...not in a bad way, necessarily, but he's definitely foggy most of the time. And that's kind of lonely for me. I want the end of April (the end of his chemo) to hurry up and get here. I want my husband back!!

And I'm ready for some good things to start happening in my life. Surely I've used up several years' worth of pain, sadness, and plain old bad luck these last few months. I sure hope so. Things sure seem hard these days.

4 comments:

  1. Sorry to read you are in a tough spot. Possibly you just have to hang in there for a few more days, or weeks. Remember, it can't rain all the time.

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  2. Sharing does help to lighten the burden. Just remember, "This to will pass." Try to focus on the good things in your life. Still got you guys in my prayers. Love X.

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  3. And to think you took the time to send words of comfort to me in the midst of your own trials. I am holding you in my thoughts.

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  4. You all are so wonderful. Thank you all so much. Your kind words mean more to me than I can say.

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