Last Saturday

Last Saturday I met a friend early in the morning for a cup of coffee and a walk afterwards. There's a new(ish) coffee shop right around the corner from my house that has access to a hiking trail nearby. My friend and I settled down with our black coffees (we're both trying to cut down on sugar and lose some weight) in the bustling little cafe and had a chat before going on our walk.

Naturally, the subject of work came up. I confided that the day before I'd heard someone (who would know) mention that the school secretary makes $***** per year. This is the secretary whose job our new principal asked me if I was interested in, set up a time to meet with me and talk about it, and then hired the day before our interview. I'd gotten over not being given a chance at the job, but then when I found out what a huge increase in salary it would have been for me, I got mad all over again. It felt good to vent to a friend about it. 

But then, in the course of the conversation I mentioned how much of a difference making almost double my current salary would make in my life. My friend stared at me for a few seconds with something like astonishment (and horror) written all over her face and then exclaimed, "You mean you only make $***** a year?!"  Um....yes. 

She sat looking at me for a few more seconds, made a few halfhearted suggestions about asking for a raise, and then completely changed the subject. She spent the next 20 minutes or so talking about her upcoming trip to Mexico (her third international trip in less than two years). I finally interrupted to say we'd better start on our walk if we were going to get one that day. I didn't feel like listening to her talk anymore right then.

I'll be honest, the whole exchange stung a little bit. I know she didn't mean to hurt my feelings; she was just too surprised to be tactful. But here's the thing: wouldn't a real friend understand without being told that a school attendance clerk makes a whole lot less money than a university faculty member? And she's married to an engineer, to boot! It's hard to believe she's never noticed the difference in our lifestyles, but she does tend to be a bit self-absorbed. Well intentioned, but self-absorbed. 

I also know I'm a bit over sensitive where money is concerned. I grew up poor, and as a kid it embarrassed me. I guess that's what triggered the small wave of shame I felt when she acted so shocked that I don't make more money. I'm approaching 50 years old and I'm still dealing with emotional issues from my childhood, which seems ridiculous. Does it ever end?

Job responsibilities (update in the comments)

 I'm getting pretty tired of going up to the school during my summer break. It's been necessary this year because there's no one working through the summer that can (or would be willing to) feed the fish and put fertilizers in the planted aquarium. I've been going up at least twice (sometimes three times) a week to do those things. It's less than two miles from my house and it only takes a few minutes, but after getting let down over the job promotion my heart just hasn't been in it. Then on Tuesday afternoon I had to go up there with Gregg. The principal wanted the big aquarium in the lobby moved to an inner hallway of the office area. It was a big job, but he's a professional and he had it done and looking great in just over 2 hours. I mainly just hung out with him and watched.

I also had another talk with the principal while I was there, at her invitation. When the secretary position didn't work out, I had had a long discussion with her about my current job responsibilities and how overwhelmed I was. How there wasn't adequate staff to cover me when I needed to take a sick day or even a lunch break sometimes. How I had gradually ended up doing the job of two or even three people. So when she asked to speak with me while Gregg worked on the aquarium, she wanted to run some ideas past me for making things better. 

First of all, she told me that she couldn't get the district office to approve an addition a dedicated secretary for the guidance department, at least not at this time. That was her first thought for me. Instead, she's giving me a private office and my job description is going to change and I'll be responsible for attendance and discipline record keeping, as well as conducting truancy interventions with families. I'll be the person that helps the guidance department with their records, too.

I'll no longer have to be in the main lobby by the front door, monitoring the camera and who to let in. At the end of last year, they installed weapons detectors and those have to be monitored now, too. I won't have to sign out students, or answer the main phone line, or be the first point of contact for all visitors. Some of that I'll miss, but I won't miss the feeling of juggling dozens of tasks all day long and barely able to keep up. It should be less stressful, and I can take a day off without worrying about anyone having to cover for me. Most of my daily work is about to become much more tedious and pretty boring, but it's essential stuff for the running of the school, and a private office makes up for a lot. It's no extra money, beyond the "step" increase we all get this year, but my stress level should go down after the initial learning curve of my new responsibilities is over. 

While I was typing this the principal called me and asked if I'd be willing to work the student registration days, July 18th and 19th. Of course, I said yes, but........damn it! Two more days chipped off my much-needed summer break. Sigh. I will get extra pay for those two days, though, since I'm not under contract to work them. My first official day back at work is July 25th. It's going to be a very different school year. I hope it's better.