Wednesday, October 28, 2020

Wednesday miscellany

 One reason that I decided to miss last Wednesday's book club meeting was because I had a very small, very careful social gathering planned at my house Saturday night. Doing both would have seemed like too much socializing in one week during a pandemic. Marla and Martina came over for food and drinks to celebrate Marla's birthday (which was actually Monday). Since it was a birthday celebration, I made a lot of food, all of our particular favorites: ham and cream cheese pinwheels, grape jelly meatballs, crudites with sour cream dip, and for sweets I made two desserts: a pumpkin spice bundt cake and double fudge brownies. And of course, there was plenty of wine. Not only did I have a couple of bottles, but Martina brought two more to share and Marla brought hard apple cider. We had a really good time.

I'm very lucky to have such good friends in my life that I can count on. Especially considering what my blood relatives are like! 

My mother reached out to me the other day via text, said some slightly rude things to me, and when I eventually responded with a carefully thought out text setting some boundaries necessary for us to have a relationship going forward, she went absolutely berserk and said some truly cruel, heartless things to me. Included in her rantings were things like: she didn't ever want to see or hear from me again, she and dad would be seeing a lawyer to change their will to make sure I don't get anything of theirs when they die, I'm hateful and ungrateful and will end up alone in the world, and more stuff in that same vein. I didn't respond. Then the next afternoon she sent me another text, saying something to the effect of: I'm sorry sweetie, I said some uncalled-for things to you, I think I'm losing my mind, I don't start off thinking crazy thoughts but somewhere things go wrong, I love you and Gregg, blah blah, blah, blah. I'm beginning to think she's got some serious loose screws upstairs. I don't know what's happened to make her and my dad go totally off the rails like they have, but I've washed my hands of it all. I'm not interested in continuing to interact with them for the foreseeable future. They obviously need counseling at the very least, and until they deal with whatever is causing them to act like this, I plan to keep my distance. If it becomes necessary, I'll block their number, too. I probably should have done so already.

Enough about that, though. I had a great time with my friends the other night. Gregg and I have been taking long walks both early in the morning and again after supper with George every day. That's always a joy. Last night we saw a large deer standing at the edge of a neighbor's driveway, just calmly watching us before ambling off into the woods. It was a large buck with big white antlers and seeing him was almost magical. We hear the Barred Owls calling at all hours after the sun goes down, and sometimes we catch a glimpse of one of them swooping silently between perches when we take our evening walk. Our neighborhood and house continue to be a source of happiness for us both! George is finally adjusting to being an "only child" and his behavior is improving from all the extra attention he gets these days. Marco is doing great. Here's a picture I just took of him a second ago as I typed this blog post.

 He's as bold and sassy as ever!

And Halloween is coming! Tomorrow is the day I go to see little P and his mom after work, and we're going to carve pumpkins! He's going to be so excited. His mom hasn't told him yet that I'm coming. She said he's going to be thrilled both because I'm coming over and because he's been bugging her for weeks to let him try to carve a pumpkin. I'll be picking up a pizza on the way over, too. It's going to be a fun time!

 I will, of course, post pictures of the finished works of art tomorrow night. :)

What are you up to this week? Are you doing anything for Halloween? I'd love to hear about it if you are!


  1. Lucky for you to have friends and fun times even during a pandemic, lucky for you to have a lovely bird too and someone to walk with morning and evening. Your Mother must have dementia- that happens especially if one's brain has not been well cared for...Dementia can strike anyone , though, I guess it does not matter if one has consumed too much alcohol in ones life, but , that, for sure is criteria. have a great time! LOVE

  2. I always find the threat of being cut out of a will rather amusing since that means the relationship has more to do with dollars and cents then anything else. That food looks totally scrumptious. And I have to tell you, your backsplash tile is very similar to the mosaic I used. Good Taste.

  3. What a scrumptious feast you have assembled! How good to be young and have friends to be happy with. And little boys to surprise with punkin carving.

  4. Oh, that food you prepared! My mouth is watering at the thought of it. We need time with others during COVID - to talk and to laugh - it makes one feel so much better. By the way, I visited Greggs on Monday! Bought a steak slice and a latte. Gregg gives good value!

    I have never done anything for Halloween and this year will be no different. Even so, I am looking forward to seeing the pumpkins you carve with Little P.

  5. Having great friends will get you through this most difficult time with your family. I agree with your mom that there is something disturbing going on with her and it is up to her to find out what it is. She needs to talk to her doctor about her mood changes and you need to do what you are doing and finding joy outside you family. Have fun on Halloween.

  6. your birthday meetup was EPIC! so much food and wine and good friends!

    my old lady pulled that same shit with me too. I didn't bother responding to a bully. I have everything I need. and I just didn't give a fuck.

    as for you and gregg and george and marco, all is right with the world. we do nothing for 10/31 cause there are no rugrats in this hood.

  7. If all else fails, you could open a café/restaurant. That all looks superb.

  8. What a wonderful time you had celebrating Marla's birthday! All that food looks just delicious!

    I'm sorry about the problems with your mother. Give it time and space and try not to let them get to you. I know, easier said than done. Keeping your distance from them is the best thing you can do for now.

    It sounds like your walks with Gregg are really nice. You are lucky to have such a nice area for your walks. I can not wait to hear all about your special pumpkin carving evening with Little P and his Mom! That will be sooo much fun!

    We don't do anything for Halloween anymore. Before I retired I worked at a medical office where we always worn costumes and had fun at work. And when my grandchildren were young they would come to see us in costume and Trick or Treat in our neighborhood. So I guess we have lots of Halloween memories!

  9. I'm glad you were able to have a festive get-together! The food looks awesome. You're such a good host.

    As for your mom -- well, it sounds like she's issuing a cry for help. I don't blame you for backing away for a while, but do you think they might agree to get some counseling? Do they have any positive social outlets (like church)? She obviously needs some support beyond anything you could be expected to provide -- it sounds like she needs some professional assessment.

  10. Oh if "miscellany" means delicious food made by you, I want a whole lot of miscellany! The food looks incredibly delicious. So sorry for the family crap. What a waste of energy. I'm glad you've created such an exceptional family with Gregg and those around you. Blood may be thicker than water, but who needs people that are thick! I had a therapist who told me a mother's love was unconditional. That's the last time I saw that therapist. We are who we are because of AND in spite of our families. YOU are wonderful!

  11. Good to have had a happy celebration with friends and to look forward to a fun pumpkin carving, pizza eating evening with P and his mom. Enjoy!

  12. The evening with your friends sounds like my kind of evening - friends, food, fun and fine drinks!
    Now I can't wait for your report about the evening at little P.'s house.
    Nothing specific happening here for Halloween; it would have been Steve's 52nd birthday and I may have a glass of pumpkin secco with my Mum in his honour.

    I like the idea of you, Gregg and George going for walks after dark, it must be magical, and the deer and owls add to it. Having found your house was just the best thing that could have happened to you and Gregg, along with changing your job (how many years now?). Any more encounters with the unpleasant dog-hating neighbour?

  13. Oh, sweetie. Our relationships with blood kin can cut deepest, can't they? They know the buttons to push because they installed the buttons! Sounds to me like your mother really may be drifting down into some sort of dementia but that's no reason at all for you to forgive such language, such abuse. You and Gregg have created, with your love and hard work, an oasis of sweetness. No one gave it to you, you made it and it is yours to enjoy and revel in.
    And boy, do you know how to put on a spread!

  14. My son has filled baggies with miniature candy bars so he can set out a long table at the end of our driveway and place the bags of candy spaced apart. Then our trick-or-treaters can safely grab a bag as they move through the neighborhood. Not sure if we will get any trick-or-treaters tho! We will see...
    Sorry about your parent troubles. Glad you have a supportive husband and friends to share your love with. I agree with other commenters that your parents should see a doctor. Maybe your response to their awful behavior will push them to get the help they obviously need. I hope so.

  15. In the end, what matters is the people who love you. It sounds as if you've got that. I am glad for that. I am sorry about the family crap. Nobody deserves that.

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