Friday, December 3, 2021

One day we'll write a book

When you work at a school, you never know what the day might bring. Everyone knows the expression "kids say the darndest things" but parents can be pretty wacky, too. Yesterday was a case in point. I took a message that might be my favorite in almost 5 years of working there. When I shared it with the rest of the staff, hilarity ensued. We all needed a good laugh, I think.


Side note: thank you all for the good wishes and support on my last post. Everyone continues to improve, even my dad, who was released from the hospital on Wednesday

46 comments:

Mistress Maddie said...

I can see why hilarity ensued!!!! I almost sprayed my coffee!!!!

Meanwhile, tell her your right on it.... tell her the school district is going to raise school taxes for millions to put in concrete warmers, so the kids will be able to sit on the concrete, hemorrhoid free.

Sue in Suffolk said...

That's what my Mum always told me too!

coffeeontheporchwithme said...

As a retired teacher, nothing, absolutely nothing, surprises me. There was once a mother who was livid because her son, who had taken a fall on an icy surface and hurt his privates, was the only one left in the lineage who could keep the name going. Pretty sure he was fine. -Jenn

Bob said...

Well, it IS cold!!!!


Glad to hear your family is all getting better.
xoxo

Mary said...

Perhaps she wants the school to provide Preparation H? Lol.

V. good news on improved family health.

Librarian said...

That must be such a relief for you, to know your Dad is improving!
Yes, every now and then we all need a good laugh. Unwittingly, your caller provided you with just that. I wonder how she'd react if she knew. And who is going to have the unenviable task to call her back?

Ellen D. said...

Glad to hear that everyone is on the mend. That sure was a stressful couple of weeks for you. Hope you have smooth sailing through some happy holidays!

Steve Reed said...

I'm so glad to hear everyone is getting better. I've been wondering about you all. That IS a hilarious message. People get the strangest ideas!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Hahahahaha, someone once told me that old wives tale too, in all seriousness and concern for my *ahem* orificial health.

Margaret said...

That is a classic. Hemorrhoids are certainly no picnic, but this person seems irrationally concerned about them.

The Weaver of Grass said...

So pleased to hear the good news about your Dad.

Ms. Moon said...

Never too young to be concerned about the development of hemorrhoids! And you know how skinny those little cold butts are! That's hysterical!
Yes. So, so glad everyone is doing better in your world. May the better health continue!

angryparsnip said...

I have no words !

John Going Gently said...

Checking in xx

Yorkshire Pudding said...

What the hell is afternoon "carline"? Not knowing that meant I could not join in with the giggling.

Margaret said...

Car line. It's where the parents wait in their cars (in a line) to pick up their children.

Cro Magnon said...

It must have been written by a Snake Oil salesman.

Moving with Mitchell said...

Glad to read the good news about your family!

Oh dear god, Ms Jones! “Not a joke” I laughed out loud!

Frances said...

Good to hear that you are all getting better. I was worried that you hadn't posted for a while. Like Mr. Pud, I also wondered what on earth an " afternoon carline" could be!

Yorkshire Pudding said...

Thanks Margaret. Mostly this does not happen in England. Over a year that is a lot of gas! (England: petrol).

Jennifer said...

We asked the school nurses if they were going to start stocking Preparation H and donut seats in the health room!!!

Jennifer said...

I never knew about this old wives' tale until this incident.

Jennifer said...

Hahaha! She was worried about the family jewels! LOL!

Jennifer said...

Thanks Bob!

Jennifer said...

One of our school nurses had to send a screenshot of that message to her nurse supervisor at the district office!!

Jennifer said...

One of the assistant principals texted that photo (without the phone number covered up) to our principal, who is away at a conference in Florida. She said, "Oates, are you going to deal with this when you get back?" Hahaha!

Jennifer said...

ps...Meike, I got your beautiful card yesterday. Thank you!! It's lovely.

Jennifer said...

The holiday season (starting just before Thanksgiving) seems to be the time of year when all kinds of health problems and stressful situations happen in my life. I hope we're done with all that for this year, at least!

Jennifer said...

Things were too grim and distressing last week for me to update the blog. I was barely getting by, to be honest. I'm glad there was finally some good news and a bit of humor to share. Thank you Steve.

Jennifer said...

Gotta keep those orifices happy! :)

Jennifer said...

I've never heard of school age kids suffering from hemorrhoids. But then, maybe it's a thing and I just didn't know it!

Jennifer said...

Thank you so much, Weave.

Jennifer said...

I had to ask her to repeat herself to be sure I'd heard her correctly! Hahaha! Everyone kept saying they didn't know how I kept my composure and didn't laugh on the phone. All I can say is, that after five years of answering a school phone, you NEVER know what you're going to hear!

Jennifer said...

No words necessary!

Jennifer said...

And how are you, John? I'm thinking about you all the time these days.

xx

Jennifer said...

A lot of gas....you have no idea, Neil. We have two car lines that wrap around both sides of the campus out to the highway. Lots of parents get there an hour before dismissal (so they can be at the front of the queue) and sit there with their SUVs idling the whole time. It's ridiculous. The children of two working parents (or the poor) have to ride the school buses.

Jennifer said...

??? I don't understand this comment.....

Jennifer said...

We all laughed so hard! I sent that photo to Martina, who was at work at the vet's office. She showed it to one of the vets and THEY all got a good laugh, too! So much fun and joy from one little phone message!

Jennifer said...

Isn't it great how we learn so much about other countries from blogs? :) The smallest things we take for granted are a mystery somewhere else.

Thanks for stopping by and checking!

Yorkshire Pudding said...

So, is there such a thing as climate change?

Jennifer said...

Of course there is.

I never said I approve of the carline practice.

Abby said...

Potential hemorrhoids? Thank goodness we only had to walk uphill both ways in the snow to school.
Glad everyone's on the mend!

nick said...

Glad everyone's improving health-wise. So sitting on cold concrete causes haemorrhoids? Where's the evidence for that? Presumably another bit of advice from Karen on Facebook.

Ur-spo said...

Oh the horror.
I deal with a lot of similar folks but I get to medicate them.

Debby said...

I'm glad that everyone is getting better in your family. I want to make fruitcakes too. I just am not sure that I will have the time this year.

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