Last Wednesday was a really nice day for me.
I took a personal day off work and drove to Aiken, SC (about two hours west of Florence) to have lunch with my aunt Linda. Aunt Linda is my dad's older sister, and his only living sibling.
I really didn't have much contact with my dad's family growing up. My mother hated and resented them her whole life and made sure no one could have relationships with them. It was all very toxic and awful, as I'm sure you can imagine.
Anyway, now that my dad is dead, and my mother and I have cut ties, I've reached out to my aunt once or twice and she seemed genuinely happy to hear from me. Back in the summer I'd found some information about my Polish great grandparents online that I wanted to share with her, so we started planning to meet. It turned out that she has all sorts of family history documents, one of which is the ship manifest from 1906 when my great grandfather, Pawel Czmiel, came to Ellis Island at the age of 17. She made me copies of everything: the ship manifest, naturalization applications, family baptism records, my grandfather's WWII military documents, and on and on. It was wonderful! We met up at a restaurant with outdoor seating (the weather was nice) and sat and talked for over four hours. My aunt was so kind to me, and so welcoming, and I look forward to building a relationship with her going forward. It's nice to feel like I still have some family left in this world, and learning more about my dad's relatives means a lot to me.
It was brave of you to make contact, and I'm glad she welcomed it.
ReplyDeleteMe too. My mom has treated her horribly over the years and I wouldn't have blamed her if she'd never responded.
DeleteHow fun to build a new warm relationship with your aunt. You must have really clicked to spend 4 hours chatting. She likely enjoyed the time together as much as you did.
ReplyDeleteThat is so very nice, and fun, and if you're lucky, she'll tell you tales you would never have imagined.
ReplyDeleteShe already has told me a few! Apparently some of my great uncles and their sons were all involved in organized crime in Chicago "back in the day".
DeleteHow wonderful to spend so much time with family! I'm glad it went so well. Now you're genealogy buddies too!
ReplyDeleteI know! How fun!
DeleteThis was such a sweet read. I bet your aunt enjoyed that visit with you just as much as you did, probably more. My own dad has been gone 25 years, but his older sister still lives and I met with her a couple years ago but the first time since I don't know when. It was so nice and made me wish we had kept in a better touch. Now we exchange letters, she's kind of old school.
ReplyDeleteHow nice that you exchange letters! I'll bet it means a lot to you.
DeleteWhat a bonanza to acquire more family - and nice ones at that!
ReplyDeleteEspecially when I have so little family.
DeleteSo wonderful to find family with shared interests. I am glad you found each other.
ReplyDeleteIt must be so nice for you to become closer to your Aunt. It's an old adage, but life is so short.
ReplyDeleteAnd when older relatives are gone, that's it. All their knowledge dies with them.
DeleteI'm sure she appreciated you contacting her as much as you did. Links between generations are surprisingly fulfilling.
ReplyDeleteI think she was really happy that I reached out.
DeleteHow wonderful!
ReplyDeleteI think so too!
DeleteI am so happy that the meeting went well. And now you have someone that you can talk with about your family roots!
ReplyDeleteIt's become obvious that if I'm ever going to know more about that side of the family, I need to find it out now while my aunt is still alive. She's the only one left.
DeleteThat must have been nice for you, and her. And a visit to Aiken sounds wonderful., I love that town.
ReplyDeleteI've only been to Aiken two or three times. It seems nice enough, but kind of boring.
DeleteSometimes getting in touch with family can be a very good thing. I'm so glad it was for you in this case. Sounds like just the sort of day you needed.
ReplyDeleteIt was really nice, feeling wanted and appreciated. Sometimes I feel kind of alone in the world.
DeleteHow nice that it worked out so well for you. It's interesting to find out family history. I hope you both will keep in touch from now on.
ReplyDeleteI think we will. We have a lot in common and we enjoyed our time together.
DeleteHow nice! It took courage to recharge out, but what a gift to discover your shared interests. Will we be reading about Pawel as you piece his life together?
ReplyDelete*Reach
DeleteI'm thinking of writing some posts about him and my great grandmother, Angeline.
DeleteThis is wondeful, Jennifer! I am sure your aunt is just as happy for you reaching out to her as you are for having done that. To her, you probably are an important and only remaining link to her late brother.
ReplyDeleteYes, she had two brothers who are both gone now. My dad was the only one of the two to have a child, so I'm her only niece (and there are no nephews).
DeleteI'm glad you got a chance to strengthen some family connections!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad she was open to it. As I said to someone in an earlier comment, my mom treated her really, really badly especially over the last few years. I wouldn't blame her if she didn't want any contact with any of us anymore.
DeleteThis is absolute gold!
ReplyDeleteThanks! :)
DeleteHow wonderful that Aunt Linda went to the trouble of rooting out those documents and making copies for you. It sounds like the two of you got on like Pixie and Dixie. Is Aunt Linda on her own? Maybe you could invite her over to The Barlow Mansion one weekend.
ReplyDeleteShe's married, and she also has two grown sons from her first marriage. Her older son is married with two kids, so she has grandchildren as well.
Delete