Disappointed

My dad's sister, my aunt Linda, was supposed to come to Florence tomorrow to spend the day with me. We've been planning it for a month, and I was pretty excited. We were going to have lunch and then go out exploring the city (she used to live here, but it's been about 20 years since she moved away and there's been a ton of growth). 

I was really touched that she wanted to drive two hours just to see and spend time with me. After my dad died my relationship with my mom broke down to the point that we're now estranged, and it's been hard effectively losing both my parents. Lately I feel sad about it a lot. It's nice having one blood relative left who seems to care about me. I was looking forward to showing Aunt Linda my house and garden and letting her meet Marco, George, and Poppy, and then spending the afternoon doing fun stuff together. I requested a personal day off weeks ago for it.

Then I woke up with a scratchy throat and a tickle in my chest on Sunday morning.

So, you guessed it...I'm sick. I felt so awful yesterday afternoon that I stopped on the way home from work and got a Covid and Flu at-home test. Both were negative. I'm guessing it's just a bad cold, but it's really knocked me for a loop. I really hated and hesitated to admit I didn't feel up to the visit, but last night I finally let her know. My aunt was super kind about it. She assured me we'd reschedule soon and told me to focus on feeling better. She also said that she's flying to Virginia this weekend to visit her son and his family and it might be wise to postpone and not risk getting sick herself right before her trip. Tonight she texted me just to check on how I was feeling, which was really nice. We agreed we'll try again in a few weeks. 

I'm still taking my day off tomorrow since I've been feeling so bad, and I need to use up some personal days anyway. I'm not looking forward to it except as a chance to get some extra rest. Then this weekend is Mother's Day and the thought of that makes me feel even more low. My mom made it plain to me last year that my cousin and her kids are her family now (she calls the children her grandchildren) and that she doesn't need or want me in her life. Which was honestly just a relief at first, but as time goes along it's come to feel more like grief. 

The C word (both of them)

After three years of testing myself every time I so much as got a sniffle, I was shocked when that second line popped up on the Covid test Friday afternoon. I almost hadn’t bothered taking a test at all, I was so sure it would be negative. I guess I'd gotten the stupid idea that I was immune after avoiding it all this time. I'd even put off getting the latest booster, which in hindsight was a real mistake. 

Puppies hanging out with me in the quarantine room.

I've been incredibly lucky; I've had colds worse than this. Mostly I ran a low-grade fever for a couple of days and felt kind of tired, along with a mild headache that came and went. There have been pretty much no respiratory symptoms, and today I feel mostly back to normal. 

But......last night Gregg started to shiver, and I took his temperature, and sure enough, he had a fever. Damn it! We tried to stay apart and be careful, but chances are I was contagious before my symptoms started. So far this morning he feels okay, and after taking a couple of Tylenol his temperature is normal. To be safe, he's headed to the doctor to confirm whether or not he's positive (we don't have any more home tests) and to get an antiviral if he is. Hopefully his symptoms will be as mild as mine, but we're not taking any chances. 

As grateful as I am that we're not any sicker, I'm sad that Christmas is pretty much going to be canceled. I missed the work Christmas party, as you know.  Then we had to cancel a planned visit from family on Sunday. My sister-in-law, Karen, was planning to come for the day along with our nephew Tyler and his wife Jessica. This was the second time we've had to cancel on them due to illness. Gregg was sick with some random virus over Thanksgiving when they first planned to come. 

Tomorrow I'll also have to miss my book club Christmas party. I had recommended the book we read this month, so I hate that I can't go. (I also missed book club last month when Gregg had the stomach virus thing). Then this coming Saturday Martina had planned to come over for our annual holiday book exchange--obviously that's not going to happen now either. And until Gregg and I both test negative, I can't go see my parents, because my dad's health is so poor that Covid would be very dangerous for him. 

I'd planned to spend a couple of days baking cookies and treats this week, but since we can't do anything or see anyone, and since we're not feeling great, I'm not going to bother. Hopefully I'll be able to mask up and go grocery shopping in another day or two, at least, because all we have to eat here at the moment are cans of soup, Saltine crackers, ginger ale, and Gatorade, all purchased hastily by Gregg over the weekend to keep us going while I was sick. Our empty fridge and pantry don't look very festive, that's for sure. 

I guess there's always next year.

Hey ho. 

So much for that.

I got a text from my realtor last night saying that the owners of the house we put in an offer for counter offered the exact same listing price--they wouldn't budge an inch. When I texted the realtor back and asked her if this means the house if off the table for us, she said that no, we can counter offer back. I have no faith in that whatsoever; we were already offering more than we had decided we would spend, and it seems that they're unwilling to consider any reduction in price whatsoever.

They bought this house in 2015 and our original offer was a tiny bit over what they paid for it. The house was appraised for what they paid only 3 years ago and they haven't made any improvements to the property. All the updates and renovations had been done by the owner before them, and they only lived there for two years when they put it on the market. No wonder it hasn't sold in almost a year...they're asking too much and seem to be unwilling to negotiate. With what they're asking and with closing costs we'd be looking at blowing our budget by $25,000 and we're determined not to do that. So unless they're just bluffing for as big an offer as possible but are secretly more motivated to sell than they appear, this house is not going to be the one. Damn it. 

Our realtor told us that she's never worked with a couple like us. Most buyers, according to her, want as much as house as they can afford. She said she's constantly having to rein in buyers (especially younger first time buyers) by reminding them of the limits of what they can borrow. Gregg and I, on the other hand, are planning to borrow a good bit less than we were approved for. We want a modest house that we can afford to pay off quickly without a monthly mortgage payment that will cripple us. In order to accomplish that goal we've got to be determined not to get carried away when we see something we like. 

This first experience has been so disappointing. It's our own fault. We spent hours yesterday (prior to getting the text about the counter offer) talking about the house. We looked at pictures and discussed where our furniture could go; we drove past the house a few times close to dark to see what the neighborhood was like on a Saturday night (nice and quiet, of course), we looked online for items we would want to buy for the house prior to moving in, like new rugs and things. I was already planning the beginning of a garden in the spring and casual summer parties on the screened in porch.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. We should have known better than to get that ahead of ourselves. We won't make that mistake again. 

Lesson learned.