Seven years tomorrow!

Today is the first day of my vacation, and tomorrow, June 12th, is my seventh wedding anniversary!

 I am one lucky woman. My husband is my best friend. He's really smart, kind, honest, hardworking, and loyal. And did I mention tough?! Last year he kicked stage 3 lung cancer's ass! He's almost 100% back to normal after having had a lung removed and then chemotherapy. I am in awe of his strength!

I wish I had a good picture of us together. We had a cheap camera when we got married (we eloped after 7 years of dating!) so although we have photos from then, they are all pasted in an album and are not in a format I can share. The year after that we bought a better camera, so here are a couple of photos from around our first anniversary instead.

 

 

 

 

Happy Anniversary dear husband! You're the love of my life. I'm looking forward to the next 7 years!

Wind and rain, and a little home lovin'

Tropical storm Andrea has cruised up the east coast, bringing with it heavy winds, rain, and the threat of tornadoes. I slept until 11am this morning. I guess the pounding rain on the roof and the cool, gray light in my bedroom kept me lingering longer in the land of sleep.

This is my last day off before vacation (which starts next Tuesday!) and so I am determined to show our house a little bit of love today. I'm trying to avoid the term "housework" because I really really don't want to do housework today, and spending the day cleaning sounds as dismal as the weather outside! Instead, I'm telling myself I'm merely showing our  home a bit of love and attention. Once I get started I'll get in the groove, so to speak, and then the chores won't feel so arduous. Speaking of getting in the groove, I will be listening to free Internet radio as I work, and Marco always tries to sing along! At least I won't lack for company or entertainment while that crazy bird is around!

Time to dust again,

Time to caress my house,

to stroke all it's surfaces.

I want to think of it as a kind of lovemaking

.....the chance to appreciate by touch

what I live with and cherish.

                           -Gunilla Norris

Vacation plans, and a decision

It's June already, and time for some vacation and some fun. Gregg and I have a whole week off together coming up! It begins next Wednesday (our seventh wedding anniversary) and continues until the following Tuesday. If the weather is good we plan to spend a night or two camping at our nearest campground with Ginger. There may also be another day trip or two thrown in, but we don't have any major plans. We could both use some down time, and the thought of planning, packing, driving, unpacking, arranging for animal care, etc. etc. for a longer journey just seems like too much work. The week will be all about relaxing!

After the vacation, I've decided to start looking for a new job.

(((deep breath...sigh)))

I hate the idea of changing jobs right now.  I have plans to go back to school part time in January to become certified in medical coding, and after a year at the local community college I should be ready to sit the exam, and then (provided I do well enough on it) I can look for a job at the hospital or a doctor's office. It seems like a real waste to change jobs when I'll only be at the next one for a year or two, tops, but I can't stand my current situation for that much longer. I have had it. Totally.had. it. As usual in life, it wasn't a major issue that brought on this decision....it was actually a straw that broke this camel's back. It's funny how that works sometimes. Here's what happened:

I got a written reprimand yesterday, my second (second!) at this job. (In my twenty years of working life prior to this bookstore I had never gotten a written warning at a job). And granted, I did something wrong and admitted it and apologized. But holy shit. To say it was trifling would be an understatement. Our store manager (along with a couple of trouble making assistant managers) have started reviewing hours of our store's video surveillance on a regular basis...not because of any specific thing, like a suspected theft, but because they want to catch people "off task". Well, back in April (April!), while I was covering a 15 minute employee break in our music/dvd department, I....brace yourselves people.....I was reading a book. In a bookstore. For 15 minutes. Shocking, I know!

So I got caught on camera, two months ago, wasting 15 minutes reading a book (while standing in a deserted department of our store, where there is literally nothing to do 75% of the time). I freely admitted it was wrong, I apologized two or three times, but this was considered a serious enough offense that I needed a written performance improvement plan. That will go in my permanent file. The manager said that having one of her under-managers doing what I did was like "a slap in her face" and that I was setting a bad example for the other employees. And that I had "really let her down". Well, I felt really bad about it (and myself) for the rest of the day and most of the night last night. But then I started to think: I do a lot of good things at work.  I am conscientious 95% of the time, and I am 100% dependable. I am kind and encouraging to my coworkers, and when I get put in charge of something I try hard to deliver good results. Yes, I am lured by the love of books to occasionally flip through something and read a little bit, but at least I'm not sneaking outside for smoke breaks all day long like every other manager there. So what if I wasted a few minutes one time back in April? Should I really beat myself up about that? And what about her, the store manager, spending hours sitting in the office looking to root out this kind of behavior? Isn't she wasting way, way more time at that? Is that really a good use of her time? I wonder what her boss would say? And what about feeling like you're being watched by Big Brother while doing your job? Is that conducive to good work morale? I think not.

And then I had a mini epiphany: this is a cheap retail job. It can be replaced. I already took a pay cut when I took this job, so it's not like I'd be giving up the most money I've ever made. And yes, I must continue to have a job that offers health care coverage, but Gregg is not going for checkups so often anymore, so if there was a month's wait for coverage to begin we would probably be ok. And why do I feel guilt about taking an in-between job that I know I'll only stay at for a year or two? As long as I do a good job for them while I'm there I don't owe anybody a lifetime commitment! Of course I knew these things anyway but those are just a sample of some of the crazy half-sub conscience thoughts that hold me back. I'm  ready to start moving forward! It's time to get rid of this miserable little job. Life is too short to spend 40 hours a week as unhappy as I've been.

But that's all for another day. I have to go to work today, and put on a smiling face, and trudge along until I make it to vacation next week...my much needed vacation! Then the job hunt begins.

All in a day's work

Weird things customers say in bookstores #834:
 

Teenage boy: Do you work here?

Me: Sure do.
Boy: Thank God! I need help finding a book from my summer reading list!
Me: What's the title?
Boy: "I Know Why the Caged Mockingbird Doesn't Sing"


(I laughed myself silly after he walked away!)

Wild lilies

One of the best things about the house we're currently renting is the fact that it used to be owned by an old couple that loved gardening. All these years later, surprises keep popping up to make us smile.

Maybe it's all the rain we've had, but for the first time in the 3 years since we moved in, these beautiful white lilies have appeared in our back yard:

 

 

 

 

These little wild beauties have a subtle sweet fragrance, and would make nice cut flowers. What a pleasant surprise! I just adore lilies.

A beautiful Sunday in May

It's my day off finally! Yay me! It was kind of a long week.

My dreaded trip to the dentist turned out to be not too bad. I only had to have a very small filling, and it was on the opposite side of my mouth than where the last ordeal unfolded.
Being a believer in better living through chemistry (ahem!)  I arrived with a Xanax dissolving in my stomach and a lovely mellow feeling of calm. I never thought I'd be the kind of big chicken that had to take an anti-anxiety pill before going to the dentist, but there you are.

I never used to fear dental appointments, when kindly old Dr. Bryce was still my dentist. He was a gentle, sweet, grandfatherly man that took lots of time and care when he worked. While he worked, he would talk about his grandchildren and growing his beloved orchids (many of which were in the treatment room windowsills). He was so careful and, admittedly, slow, that there was never anything to fear with him. Unfortunately he retired rather suddenly last fall, and it was awhile before the ladies in the office explained why. Apparently he was having memory problems and was showing signs of early dementia, and his kids cornered him with his family doctor and recommended he retire. Right away. So he did, and I am sad to see him go. Since then, the practice has been run by a couple of other local dentists who are filling in until a new permanent dentist is found. I've not been impressed with the work they've done so far, but at least this last time wasn't so traumatic. One of these days soon, when I work up the courage to tell the office ladies I'm leaving (ridiculous, I know) I'm going to find a new dentist. I've had several local people make recommendations, it's just a matter of doing it. I feel like I'm bailing on the rest of Dr. Bryce's leftover staff, and that makes me feel guilty. But that's a story for another day.

Right now, it's a beautiful Sunday afternoon. We've had the most amazing cool sunny days lately! It's a real departure from our usual weather this time of year---already hot and humid. This is Memorial Day weekend, and it's turning out to perfect weather for all those people with a long weekend off. Traditionally people cook out over this holiday weekend, and spend plenty of time outdoors.

I've been doing as much of that as possible myself. Gregg and I have been grilling out whenever we can (last night included) and sitting on the patio in the evenings watching the big full moon of May rising, me with a glass of wine in hand. This afternoon will be spent outside in the hammock with the book I'm currently reading (The Mists of Avalon, and I'm enjoying the heck out of it!) and Ginger to keep me company. I have wild white lilies blooming by our back door, and my lavender bush is on the verge of blooming. The temperature is perfect. It's going to be a lovely day to be out there, enjoying some down time and relaxation.

Happy Memorial Day weekend to my U.S. readers, and may everyone have a beautiful, happy day. Get outside and soak up some sunshine if you can!

Declaration

Today I head back to the torture chamber dentist for another filling. And I swear by all things holy, if that jerk hurts me again like last time, I will find a new dentist! Crossing my fingers (and taking a Zanax) and hoping for the best.

A longer blog post will follow later, with my thoughts on why I'm still (at almost 40 years of age) a wimp about standing up for myself. It's been on my mind a lot this week.

Little neighborhood gang

Last week our mail carriers were collecting food for the local food bank. They leave a couple of plastic bags in your mail box early in the week, with a note announcing the food drive, and anyone that wants to donate can fill the bags with non perishable foods to be picked up on the designated day.

It's a very worthy cause.

Food banks really struggle this time of year. Donations pour in during the holidays, but then take a nosedive in the spring. For families struggling with hunger, this is an especially difficult time. School will be out for the summer soon, which means that kids from low income families that rely on the free breakfasts and lunches provided there are at a much greater risk for going hungry. I think it's wonderful that the postal service does a food drive in May for this reason. I always fill up a couple of bags to donate and leave them, as instructed, beside the street for the mail carriers to take.

On the day of this year's pickup, Gregg was at home reading a book when he heard the doorbell ring. He answered the door to find two little neighbor girls (aged about 8 or 9) and their mom standing there. The mom explained that her daughters had been going around our neighborhood peeking into all the bags, and they had deemed ours "the best" and then....they stole it!!!!

 Gregg had to bite his lip not to laugh. The mom kept saying how embarrassed she was, and she made the girls apologize. She asked him if anything was missing from the bags (so she could replace it). He of course had no idea, since I'm the one that takes care of those types of things. He couldn't really think of anything to say to the kids, except "You shouldn't embarrass your mom!" and of course he accepted their apology and told the mom to think no more of it. He got a huge kick out of the whole thing, and so did I when he told me about it later. I decided it must have been the box of brownie mix I had included that tempted the kids.

We had forgotten the incident until last night. When I went out to check our mail, I found a package of brownie mix in the box with this note taped to it:

Dear neighbors at 1900...

It has come to my attention that my 5-year old son was a partner-in-crime in the theft of a box of brownie mix. I apologize on his behalf. While he isn't old enough to understand what the food was for, he was certainly old enough to know that he shouldn't take something that is not his.

I have bought two boxes of brownie mix. One, I am returning to you and the other we are taking to a family in need. Our family works with a homeless/hunger ministry on Saturdays. One of the families that we work with will be blessed by brownies. It is a grandmother raising 6 grandchildren on her own and with very little resources. This little girl below is one of the children.

Again, I apologize and hope this helps to rectify the situation.

The Jordan family at 1889

Turns out there was a little gang of kids complicit in the Great Brownie Heist of  '13!! Haha!

This seriously made my day!